In a cafe

Looking for a sandwich, I go to the counter :

“Hi, can you tell me what sandwiches you have please?”

“What do you want love?”

“I’d like to know which sandwiches you have”

“Yes, but we’ve got rather a lot, what sort of sandwiches do you like?”

“I like lots of different fillings, could you run through them please?”

We’ve got cheese, ham, tuna?”

“…Any others?”

“well, egg? What do you want?”

“So you just have cheese, ham, tuna and egg.”

“no, we’ve got lots more than that? But I need to know the kind of thing you want?”

“”I’d really like to know the range of fillings you have on your board”

She sighs irritatedly.

“Oh, alright, we’ve got, cheddar with red onion chutney and rocket, egg anchovy and lettuce, smoked ham with jarlsberg and avocado, Cajon tuna with sweetcorn, coronation chicken with green peppers, tiger prawns with iceberg lettuce and lemon mayo, falafel with chilli mayo and smoked salmon cream cheese and gherkin.”

 

Comments

  1. Nikki-music camp, the one with the ducks.2 March 2020 at 20:16

    Falafels and chilli mayo sounds good.

    ReplyDelete

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

'Are you causing trouble again?'

I can’t say how irritating, embarrassing and patronising it feels to hear the phrase: “are you causing trouble again?” used as a greeting to me in a kind of over-familiar, knowing, slightly too loud, falsely aspirant voice, intended more to be heard by others than for me.   It’s happened so many times over the years - in cafes, when I’ve been queuing at the counter, conferences when I’ve been trying to find somewhere to sit, arriving at a meeting and finding a seat or a cup of tea…   It often happens when I am in a less than familiar or uncomfortable situation , and never said by people who are close to me, but by people who don’t know how to be around me, people who perhaps have a view of me, their way of matching me with some stereotype of blind people that I can be slotted into.   I’m not a natural ‘trouble-causer’ )whatever that may be) or at least I don’t carry any trouble-causing that I might exude with pride or confidence. I can be difficult,, edgy sometimes, critical, challengi
Read more

On-street greetings - continued

Following my earlier post, I realised that I hadn’t fully made my point and wanted to finish it.   Sight, with its ability to see faces, might provide ways in to a more connected experience of neighbourhood and community than blindness.  As people walk about the streets, nodding or smiling in acknowledgement of each other as they pass.  Without being able to see people’s faces, to see them making such non-verbal acknowledgement of my existence, I find walking around the streets of my neighbourhood an isolating  experience, passing countless people  in complete silence and at most moving out of each other’s way (other than those who know me). This is far more so for me in the city where there are people who won’t speak to each other, than in the countryside where I might encounter nobody.   I noticed people actually speaking to each other on the streets during lockdown – just saying ‘HI/Alright’ and hoped that the practice would continue, but it seems that things have all too quickly dr
Read more

They just can't help themselves

I went for my first COVID vaccination at the beginning of March at my local health centre. After (fairly logically) queueing outside the main entrance for 10 minutes, I learned through overhearing a conversation at the front of the queue that the vaccinations were taking place in another part of the building with a different entrance. The health centre  had not thought to communicate this to their patients in advance as the written signs were expected to do the trick for everyone. The receptionist on the door apparently suffered from the (not uncommon) white stick blindness, and I realised that she was using gesticulations to indicate the direction I needed. After having explained that the white stick meant that I couldn’t see enough to follow her directions, I eventually found my own way to the correct (tucked away and locked) entrance. I (perhaps too politely) suggested that it would have been helpful if they could have tagged visually impaired patients in their database giving us cl
Read more